Saturday, March 24, 2007

1:16 a.m.

it's really time to go to bed, but. . .I love this time of night. This house is so incredibly noisy during the day. Given the sounds are really happy alive kids when they aren't bickering. . .but it's good noise, you know. I usually am cuddling with my pooch working on something late, or taking a bath, or watching a show. I love the quiet. It is addicting. I guess it's non fat and non alcoholic, so it must be ok. I cannnnnot for the life of me wake up without an alarm these days. If I know I have messed up and stayed up way past what is healthy for me, I try not to look at the clock as I go to bed. This way I cannot mentally feel tired, all the way, because I don't have any idea how I abused myself. So, here I sit. A little preoccupied with nothing. Over tired and I will go crawl into bed. I slept in my clothes last night, I think just because. Kevin likes the room so stinking cold I think I just forgot to get more comfortable. We are down to our last few pieces of wood. I think I will load what we have left tomorrow, so that I can have some fires this week. It's hard to draw, paint or even want to be in our bedroom suite the 'garage'. . .when it's so cold. Noises I hear at this moment. Pug's soft breath, a snore from down the hall, rain, the blue flower clock that I didn't know had a second hand. . .the hum inside my computer and the furnace coming on? There is actually a chorus of little noises all around me, all soft, but in a complex rhythm. I think I hear my mom's tv, no that is Eli snoring I think. Anyways. . .time for bed.

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